So Afraid

I'm not afraid,

I wake up and I'm not afraid

of wrecking my car.

I live every moment and I'm not afraid

of being robbed.

I go places and I'm not afraid

of people taking advantage of me.

I apply and I'm not afraid

of being rejected.

I find myself unhappy and I'm not afraid

of dying.

I am afraid though,

but not of those things.

Those fears are over shadowed by my fear of you

never being my friend again,

never again being the one I turn to when something big happens,

never calling me again just because you wanted to talk,

never telling me that I'm your best friend

and that you would do anything for me.

I'm afraid I will never get that back,

I'm afraid that I wont be able to go on

living without you there.

I'm so afraid.